New Year, Same Me

   As the hours wane for 2018, a tradition of looking through the thousands of photographs I've taken throughout the year commences. 

 t first begins with just me reliving the past year but inevitably, I begin roping in my clan to join in the memories. With the ease of technology in this age, not only do I have photographs to recollect, both in digital and hardcopy forms,  but short videos and memes I’ve designed as well. This morning, we marveled at how our lives changed throughout this past year and how many fun memories we made just enjoying our day to day. Last year’s focus was, in fact, making memories.





  For those who wish to just read the highlights:

• Keira is living in an apartment in New Underwood, tackling night classes and management classes while working full time. She is also New Underwood's resident Cat Lady.
• Sydnie moved into her first apartment in Rapid City, graduated high school, and is holding two jobs with one being in the healthcare field, with on the job training for becoming a nurse. She was accepted to SDSU but has chosen to decline the offer until she truly knows where her interests are.
• Summer is an avid Summer....doing her thing, taking high school classes, being a role model “big”  sister and designing and creating her costumes for the next comic con.
• Finn began the year crawling and finished the year sprinting and toilet  trained. She is an artist, gardener, chef, housekeeper, sports lover and outdoors girl obsessed with her hatred of  flies.
• Clayton knows stuff.
• Cris knows lots of useless but interesting factoids.

   We began our year traveling for business in a record winter storm. We found ourselves in minus 21 below as a high, just a few mere miles from the Great White North,  staying extra days to make an important meeting for his career. We still remember quite fondly just how warm the hotel's wonderful pool was. In South Dakota, the weather was unseasonably warm with open waters and Summer, Finn & I took in more trails of the beautiful Black Hills with our four footers. Our backyard was still welcoming as we practiced our yoga daily outside and Finn explored the grounds crawling around.


   February brought the snow to our area, forcing us indoors more often, and thinking about the possibilities that our future held. Dreams abounded! My artwork took on more meaning, more of me poured into each stroke. After years of self teaching, I challenged myself to not mask my visions any longer or get wrapped up on the rules. My Clayton has unlocked any door I had. I found myself painting more often and with purpose....not lost or anxiety ridden as I had always been before. My days of nurturing our wee Finn with breastmilk were quickly coming to an end and I took in every second I could. I kept to my autoimmune lifestyle and my hair has been the longest it has been in over 25 years! 


    March is monumental in our family...it hosts the date of our marriage plus the start of what we call "the birthday season". Finn celebrated her first birthday in Finn fashion at a local hotel's swimming pool with our family and some of her extended family. Her older siblings were joyous to "swim with the Roo" and the grandparents enjoyed watching our family be a family together. Our kids, ranging in ages from 1 to 20, have lots of varying goals-There's lots going on for us to enjoy!


   Our April was filled with birthdays and fun stuff like Finn AND Clayton's first kite flying adventure. We celebrated the arrival of spring with backyarding, hiking and cycling. We enjoyed our Mustang and listening to the birds talk in our yard. Prom was in our midst again and the weather held perfect. We were no longer held hostage indoors, reflecting on things yet to come or not come on the business side of our lives.
   My sweet husband adopted a bonsai tree for me  for Mother's Day and I began the art of bonsai. Steeped in history, this art quickly is becoming a passion for me. The tree still lives.  My birthday was spent in a tree line along a crest of the Black Hills with two of my favorite people. And true to form, the girls and I were lost for a short stint. Our adventure brought us to breathtaking views and laughs. Also, when we got cell service again, I found myself  ribbed in texts by  beloved cousins about my coupe of the year older persuasion and I quickly let my parents who had been waiting in our driveway to take me to lunch that we were alive and well and 20 minutes out since I knew where we were finally. Such is the fantastic life of an immensely lucky home gal.
   Summertime in our house means outdoors as much as possible. We swim, we hike, we bike, we stargaze, we dream, we love, we laugh, we savor. We garden and enjoy what our backyard offers us. It is my art studio, our family gathering place, movies under the stars  and as a wildlife watching point as deer live in the backyard next door. We got to see our resident doe calf twins there. Magic happens when you open your eyes and see. I am a nature mom....getting to be home has been simply amazing. We were outside by 8am, backyard outdoor yoga at 9, playing and artwork or basketball or swimming or blowing bubbles, playing the uke and inside by 8 lol. I didn't think I did as much hiking this year - until I looked back at my photographic history. 

 e might have rivalled our 50+ miles we put on last year! This year, Summer bypassed me in height too and those  long legs served her well on the trails with her finishing first for a change.


   Our summertime ended with a few car travels - we enjoyed the hospitality of the big city Minneapolis on a business excursion, with Clayton having an important meeting and the girls and I taking in the local transportation to downtown. We took the girls to a fondue restaurant and the Mall of America. We finished our summertime season with a joy ride to New Mexico, staying at their state parks in our tent with our four footers. We loved everything we experienced there from the locals to the vast views and beautiful colors Life is a bit slower there than we are accustomed to in the north. We swam in sinkholes,  looked at aliens and apartments. 

On that trip, we were called by mom to say dad was rushed to the hospital for his heart failure condition. His emergency visit prompted his doctor to push his heart surgery that seems to be working wonderfully. Mom is semi-retired (if there is such a thing) and they seem to be on the go! She had her share of health problems but with the right crap (I’m being literal) she is her old self again! 
     Our fall was busy with Sydnie moving into her first apartment and graduating from high school. She is working two jobs, one in the healthcare field working her towards becoming a nurse.  Keira is living in an apartment with her boyfriend in New Underwood and  taking evening classes, working on management classes for her job and working full time. She also is New Underwood's resident Cat Lady. She is loving being a fur baby mom. Summer began the year in middle school classes and finished the year excelling  in high school classes. She is a wizard in algebraic forms and advanced high school geometry. She also is celebrating the fact that she can finally read movie subtitles in the amount of time needed without pausing the show....#dyslexialife.
   Winter arrived for us in our last night  in the tent - on  a camping trip at Angostura with my parents and uncle. We had a glorious bike ride around the reservoir, good food and campfire laughter and awoke to snowflakes as the heater in our tent kept the cold out.

   My extra time away from much social media has afforded me more time to work on personal goals.  This fall, my newest artwork captured the eye of a curator and I was encouraged to submit artwork to a board of their curators. I was awarded not one, but two, one-year contracts by an INTERNATIONAL art gallery, 1340gallery, that represents "not only artists you know, but artists you should know". This gallery is a tremendous opportunity towards my global art goals. Locally, one of my pieces was used as a business’ IGChristmas greeting. In June, I traded a few paintings for a ukulele and boy did that turn into a massive obsession.  I also have achieved a third grade level in Spanish and am still working on it. I'd say the grammer or proper use of grammer has been the biggest difficulty. Finn can take direction in both English and Spanish at this point. I practice using it in real life with others on my Instagram and that has been a huge asset since I have to spell things correctly too.

   Clayton and I have learned the art of patience not only with this gaggle of girls but in his career path as well. The government works like molasses in winter sometimes! We plan on supplying details in the near future...however, we thought that last January! 

Happy New Year and to all and a prosperous and blessed 2019!

Hi I'm your new SCOBY! Now what????

 

After baby and momma yoga

bevvy of Homemade

Kombucha brew!

  Welcome to the world of Kombucha! Homemade is so much better and tastier than commercial stuff, just like anything. Plus, you can love this little SCOBY knowing it found a wonderful home! So there's a few things you'll need to start your own Kombucha system. If you are lucky enough to have one of my OOLONG SCOBYs, all the better! Also remember to keep clean utensils including hands when handling your SCOBY and any Kombucha equipment. You do not want to introduce a bad bacteria.

1. Keep your SCOBY out of direct sunlight at all times. The "good" bacteria colony does not like the sun's powerful rays.

2. You'll need to brew your kombucha in a one or two gallon glass jar - with or without a plastic spicket without a fitted lid. I use a fresh napkin with a ribbon tied around the neck to keep debris out of the brew but allow it to breath.

3. The newly brewed green or black tea needs to be cooled to room temperature before adding that to the jar. The sweet tea mix your SCOBY will love is one gallon of tea and one cup of sugar. Also the water used must not contain chlorine like in municipal drinking water. I always use distilled or you will get mold on your SCOBY. (the bad bacteria will win the battle)

4. After about a week, dry out a taste of your brew....you decide when it's ready to bottle for the second fermentation. This roughly two day process, is when you add the fruits and delights that will make it wonderfully tasty and fizzy bubbly! You'll know when it's ready when you see little bubbles on the top line. We keep our Kombucha in a cupboard in glass jars. Never use plastic - it explodes and really isn't ideal for the Kombucha brewing process.

5. When you bottle for second fermentation, remember to love your new SCOBY and put it in your own hotel....mine is a box in the cupboard and I use plastic freezer bags to hold it with about a cup of kumbucha or 2 cups of fresh sweet tea mixture.

6. Always keep 10% of your Kumbucha with your SCOBY to start your new batch. If you happen to need to start from a fresh sweet tea mixture, it may take up to 2 weeks for your brew to turn itself into Kombucha!

7. Lastly, love this little colony of goodness! The vitamins and nutrients it provides is amazing! Peace Love and Namaste! Enjoy the process of the brew, new Brew Master!

Tuna Casserole for Hashi Warriors

   Hey everybody! Spring has sprung and we have assorted birds calling out to meet the bird of their dreams now! We are all coming out of the wintry conditions to feel the sunshine and smell the fresh breezes.

   Today, I'm going to chat a bit about how I manage my Hashimoto's Thyroiditis with something you need everyday...FOOD! Since my diagnosis, I have become quite a foodie and actually enjoy my food more than I ever have in my whole life! It's wonderful to eat and not feel lousy after I fuel my body. I have more flavor in every morsel than ever and I really do not have to pass on much except if we are at a community pot luck. There are diets to follow and it can really seem staggering to include all of those and convert to a Hashimoto's friendly atmosphere. While I won't go in depth here on the complete diet (click here to see what you can have!)  required for impact, I will share a tip or two on one of my family's favorite dish....Tuna Noodle Casserole. The topic of noodles cane up with our now afult daughter since she’s in her own and began cooking, so I thought I needed to share our noodle knowledge wealth! :)
   If you are like me, we discovered that gluten was a major trigger for my Hashimoto's. Removing gluten from your diet was tough at that time when labels weren't required to put GLUTEN FREE in bold, but these days, with the labels saying the allergens, it's so easy! That's the easy part....the tough part is saying good-bye to a few favorited food friends. I've always enjoyed my fruits and vegetables and rice as well. The important thing about halting the affects of Hashimoto's is finding the root or the trigger of your autoimmunity. Once that is pin pointed, you can stop your immune system from going whacky and attacking other important parts of YOU! OK, enough about FINDING YOUR ROOT CAUSE (click that link to start that journey!), and back to the chatter of yummy food!
   Not everyone in our family needs or has to be gluten free. But, I do the cooking so the majority of the creative genius meals are so we all can enjoy meals TOGETHER and not feel like outcasts in our own health journey! One of our favorite dishes is Tuna Noodle Casserole and we had to pull this from the menu temporarily while I was learning how to cook and bake gluten free. A good tip about gluten free noodles....always try to find corn and rice noodles to substitute for your old recipes. These taste and feel about the same as the wheat noodles. We have discovered that noodles made from other grains will feel like sand or the taste will be overwhelming and ruin an old favorite dish! I have substituted the corn and rice noodles and nobody was the wiser!

   Please enjoy my Tuna Noodle Casserole recipe and hopefully it will become your new comfort food! This dish with the dairy may not be everyone's cup of tea, and I do not have the nutritional content for it, but it was a welcomed favorite we had to put on hold for a while until I perfected the recipe. The old recipe had wheat noodles and Miracle Whip, both containing gluten.

Tuna Noodle Casserole

2-3 foil packets of tuna 
2 12 oz boxes of gluten free rotini noodles made with corn and rice
1 cup sour cream
2 cups mayonnaise
1-1 1/2 cups milk or nut milk
4 cups sharp cheddar cheese, shredded
1/2 teaspoon sea salt, stay clear of Iodized salt! (get iodine through kelp instead)
Freshly ground pepper to taste

  Cook the noodles according to the package. Preheat oven to 375 degrees. Mix together above ingredients in oven proof pan or dish. Bake covered for 30 minutes, uncover and bake for 10 minutes longer to achieve a golden top. Serve after briefly cooling a few minutes.

Blessings from our clan and enjoy your journey for health!

Life's twists: Keeping your stress in check

Hi my fellow warriors, family and friends new and old!

First off - our love goes out to our friends in Florida & the Carolinas-heck, all of  the areas affected by Hurricane IRMA!

The world is with you.

   It's been a while since my last post....there has been much to process for our little family! No worries - everyone here is healthy and that is the best thing in the world! Our children grow and grow each day it seems and Clayton and I are too (in other ways). When life gets too cozy, curve balls are a must to keep things interesting, I guess.

   It's easy to get overwhelmed by the stress and let my autoimmune condition get the best of me. For those unfamiliar, anyone with an autoimmune condition that has a tremendous stress mounted on them  will begin to have immune system problems if steps aren't taken to relieve it. Sickness will mount in the form of  colds and flus until you can get back in control and put your stress in check. It's not only important for me but also my family that we spend a few moments every day for ourselves without the thoughts of what might be.

   There are strategies we can all utilize when life's situations can get up in your face and shake things up. Stress cannot be avoided, but it can be dealt with in a healthy manner.

Some tips from the National Institute of Mental Health include: 

• Recognize the Signs of your body's response to stress, such as difficulty sleeping, increased alcohol and other substance use, being easily angered, feeling depressed, and having low energy.
• Get Regular Exercise. Just 30 minutes per day of walking can help boost your mood and reduce stress.
• Try a Relaxing Activity. Explore stress coping programs, which may incorporate meditation, yoga, tai chi, or other gentle exercises. For some stress-related conditions, these approaches are used in addition to other forms of treatment. Schedule regular times for these and other healthy and relaxing activities.
• Set Goals and Priorities. Decide what must get done and what can wait, and learn to say no to new tasks if they are putting you into overload. Note what you have accomplished at the end of the day, not what you have been unable to do.

   A big change for me is not being employed at all this year besides the occasional freelance work....I've always held even a part-time job  (usually 2-3) as I raised the older girls and this is a new concept! How exciting and FUN it was to be able to just be a mom for a while. And then this happens--- your partner's position of over five years gets yanked with less than a week's notice..right 

around the day after his birthday. Sometimes timing stinks.

Thankfully, with both of us used to living on the edge with no real salary to speak of, we had a nice little cushion in the bank. After the initial panic subsided (and let me assure you - we are talking a few days), we tried to enjoy a little vacation time. It has been literally years since we've enjoyed even a weekend off together and even with the arrival of Finn, Clayton was granted three days off of work only. Such is the life of the hourly employed.

   This happened August 1st and it is now mid-September. We couldn't afford to spend too much while we wait for our opportunities to reveal themselves, so we chose to enjoy the scenery around the area we live. Hiking seemed to revive us and open our minds to big changes.

Chica, Finn and I

Lost Cabin Trail, Black Hills, South Dakota

     Clayton has secured a temporary position through a Veterans program  and we are so grateful for that. It is, however, significantly less an hour than what we are used to making and he has an hour commute each work day. We have all switched over to days....that's a big change. We always have enjoyed operating on a schedule that less people take. We loved operating in the minority.  Now we are a weekday family. I have lost my yoga and swimming partner for the time being. We get to swim together once a week - sometimes less due to our new schedule.

   There are positives that we have found with this scenario, however. We really had to sit down, examine  and be open about things we really want. We looked at  what we thought of ourselves, see how we saw ourselves in the mirror...our qualities, our experiences. We actually used this as yet another way to learn more about each other and somehow I think we appreciate the other even more....if that was possible! This was another instance that we were each other's solid foundation in another one of life's lovely whirlwinds. 

My person :)

   We both have been offered job opportunities and we are carefully deciding  if that is the direction we are thinking is best for us and our family. Some of my fellow Hashi warriors have reached out to me and I might be joining up with them on a little business venture....if I pull the trigger, you'll be hearing about it for sure!

    Hiking has been a great tool for me...I feel grounded, stronger, get fresh air and our girls really love being in the wilderness. It's great for all of us! We also have connected with friends with hiking - it's been a win/win.

Hiking a National Park a few hours

away from where we grew up.

Badlands National Park, South Dakota

Black Hills, South Dakota

Mommy & Me yoga at home

Hiking the Badlands with my pal Amy

Until next time!

Blessings!

Stay strong, my friends!

Diapiers, nappies, rubber pants, pilchers, etc.

   We know ALOT about diapers these days. We strictly use cloth diapers in our day to day lives with a small exception for when we are on the go and rinsing isn't readily available. WE LOVE CLOTH DIAPERS! It really is no extra work, our home doesn't smell like a toilet bowl with air fresheners attempting to cover up the smells of ammonia and waste. And the best part of our experience with using cloth diapers is that our little wee girl has yet to have a diaper rash and she is nearing the 4 month old mark. On the occasions we do use commercial disposable diapers, we noticed how much they smell...bad. It smells of urine and plastic and things we do not want near our baby's skin. She is precious, darn it!
   To pass the time away while my body was the best home a body could be to our little lady, and mostly to take our minds off of the gut wrenching worry that our baby would leave us too soon,  we made our own cloth diapers. It really helped keep me positive and have a good outlook that our miracle was going to happen. I bought a wonderful design off of a mom on Etsy from UberDomestic and we couldn't be happier. The only hang up with this was our little wonderful girl  has been able to hold her urine and go huge amounts. I quickly made some cloth soaker inserts to add to our already All-In-One models and she still can bust the seams with wet! I began designing my own version for babies like her and I think I've finally perfected it.
  So, for my Earth loving Aussie girl Carly Gladwell down under, here are the steps to make the Ness cloth diaper. Enjoy the arrival of the new grand baby!
  OK for the outer waterproof layer, we used PUL fabric. It's amazing and easy to sew!
This is how we made an All-In-One diaper...all in one means that you do not need a waterproof cover or  add a soaker line, it's already on the diaperr. You can buy toss away liners but we installed a sprayer on the water line of our toilet and we can spray the diaper out as we go! It's AWESOME!!!

First off, cut out your patterns. You will have one waterproof layer, two diaper liner layers, your set number of soakers (we used zorb diaper fabric for that) and a catch layer for extra protection.

We used organic diaper liner bamboo fabric for the layer that touches the baby's skin.

This is the shape of the soaker...use as many as four layers but at least two for a minimum.

We sewed the soaker pads into the layer.

Then we added this lovely little catch layer. It has 1/8 inch elastic sewn into the sides to make a trough.

This is the same diaper, just with a fabric that you can see better. Sew the outer shell along the top back, leg holes to  the soaker piece together with a straight stitch.

Now add whatever elastic width you want with the elastic stretched to your desired bunching along the top back and leg holes.

Remember this piece? Now you are going to sew it using whatever stitch you are comfortable with to the outer shell of the diaper, making a complete one piece. Make sure the edges are tucked in and finished.

Finish the diaper with your desired fastener choice....we have used both snaps and Velcro. Velcro is wonderful for the new parent that is afraid of diapering but the snaps are amazing and is the choice for our household. 

Blessings and happy sewing! Enjoy the fresh air cloth diapers can provide!

Surviving postpartum with your thyroid monster

   AAAAHHHH the little bundle you've been waiting for has arrived!

Hopefully, you got to have the amazing birth experience you have been striving for like we did! Our journey that led with our Finn in our arms was miraculous, beautiful and soul quenching.....and then we spent our recovery time monitoring not only my recovery but prepping for the probable thyroid issues that moms with hyperthyroidism and hypothyroidism have to endure after bringing a life into the world. Thyroid issues..it is a flurry of symptoms that can hit at any moment when your hormones fluctuate severely like they do after you have a baby. It can't be avoided. The best you can do is prepare for it by pre adjusting your medication while you are recovering from labor and delivery and following your recovery directions to every detail. Pay attention to your body and how it feels. Rest ALOT and eat properly. Continue to take your supplements. I cannot express how important it is to stay off your feet. After two weeks, even one event will deplete your energy levels and you know what? That's perfectly fine and to b expected. Your energy will eventually return! Just spend time enjoying your little wonderful miracle!

       I cannot thank my husband and my family enough for taking such good care of me during my recovery. My husband was by my side every hour for the days he was absent from work, changing Finn and allowing me to adhere to my week long bedrest mandate ordered by our midwife. My mom filled our pantry and fridgerator/freezer with easy to make meals and family favorites so my husband and daughter could handle mealtimes with ease. We were so blessed with her foresight for that....we had food for weeks! Our daughter kept up with the household chores. My father-in-law, who happens too live next door, made himself available when my husband had to return to work for any small requests that might arise. We are so blessed! It took me a good two weeks for my symptoms to level out. The brain fog lifted, the rapid heartbeat, the added profuse sweating, the insomnia finally left. The blues didn't take hold like they can with thyroid people....Smiles were all around our little house!

  When your thyroid hormone wildly fluctuates from delivery, it can swing from hypothyroid, which means your thyroid isn't making enough hormone and you supplement that, to hyperthyroid, which means you have too much thyroid hormone in your system. Symptoms can range from headaches to rapid heart rate, inability to handle heat, severe sweating, dehydration, vision changes, swollen eye lids, fatigue, insomnia, joint pain and much more. Not only are you recovering from the pregnancy, you are dealing with these symptoms all while adjusting to supplying milk to your wee one too.
   In severe cases, a thyroid storm can occur which can be fatal in adults. If you have any of the following symptoms, please contact your midwife or obstetrician immediately.

• A very high fever of 100 degrees to as high as 106 degrees.
• A very high heart rate, which can be as high as 200 beats per minute (BPM). 
• Palpitations, chest pain, and shortness of breath.
• High blood pressure.
• Confusion, delirium, and even psychosis.
• Extreme physical and muscle weakness
• Extreme fatigue and exhaustion.
• Extreme restlessness, nervousness, and mood swings.
• Exaggerated reflexes, especially in knee and ankle areas.
• Difficulty breathing.
• Nausea, vomiting, and diarrhea.
• Profuse sweating or dehydration.
• Stupor or coma

Please take care of yourself as you recover from your miraculous journey! Blessings from our family to you!

How our pregnancy journey became magical

   Hey kids from around the world....it's been a while since I've checked in or updates and we just had so many decisions to make on a day to day basis that I just didn't know how to feel about things.
   I'm going to start by saying I have the greatest amount of respect and adoration for my husband, best friend and partner. We made memories that nobody will understand or can even fathom and connect with....he is my breath. Period.
 And now............drum roll .........

Presenting our rainbow girl

Finn Bree Ness

Born March 4, 2017

4:30 PM

in the comfort of our home

   We had quite a journey that turned from truly feeling  terrifying to absolutely magical. From December onward, my husband  took it upon himself to be my most important resource, he helped me and agonized with me.  He learned how to give prenatal massages and learned Doula techniques to help me on a daily basis to turn the baby, keep the baby in the correct birthing position and things that helped me to breath and exist. We ended up having an extra amount of fluid that sent me to the emergency room twice with contractions....information we learned with our first visit with our midwife after she studied my medical records.  We had not been seeing eye to eye with our ob doctor and many times would get zero answers from her or her office.  After a terrifying visit at our local  Emergency Room the beginning of February we began to think outside of the box. I just didn't feel safe under the supervision of my doctor and our guts were telling us to do everything in our power to get away from that situation. It was late in the game for that so options in the United States are limited thanks to our laws. I was still under the care of my chiropractor and that office kept a nice eye of us while we made our decisions.
   Outside of the box in rural United States looks like, hmmm everybody goes to the hospital to have their babies, so any deviation from an OB or even a hospital is a little extreme in some people's eyes. My friend suggested a midwife for us. After researching that option, we both knew that was exactly the kind of care that I needed. I am a hands-on, take charge of my health kind of girl. I do not like too much medical intervention, I believe in myself and the power and might of my body. With all  three of daughters, I had natural childbirths, of which Clayton witnessed none.  Even this late in the game, at 35 weeks, this might still be an option. My parents were behind our decision 100 percent...they knew how afraid we both, and basically our children as well, of the care we were receiving.  We were terrified. I had been housebound since November and this journey was not a fun or enjoyable experience.
   We met our beloved midwife on a sunny afternoon in the comforts of our home, my husband donning his lazy sweatpants and slippers and me mounted and affixed on my birthing ball set up in our living room. I was so uncomfortable and had been for months, this was usually where I was found. She meticulously scanned my medical records for any indication that I would NOT be a good candidate for home birthing. After all, the midwife does not want to nor will be supervising  a candidate that is not within her guideline levels or comfort levels. A midwife should be certified and have an extensive background in nursing and child birthing.
    People in the medical profession always are astounded with my vital signs...they are always much better than even people that are in their 20s. Medically speaking I was the perfect candidate for home birth. It was also noted in my medical records that I had excess amniotic fluid, which could impede our baby connecting with the birthing canal, I was being kept hyperthyroid instead of inside my thyroid guidelines and that the actual due date of our little one was March 7, not the 12th as the ob office  continually told us. We were in the one week window to have a full term baby!
   We began talking about the why we wanted this and what we expected from this experience. My husband simply said he wanted his wife to survive and the baby as well. She smiled and gave a chuckle and said that nobody would be dying on her watch. She then suggested I turn toward the exercises on spinningbabies.com to expand my hips since I was extremely fit going into this pregnancy....and I was going to kind of pay for that with super tight ligaments and joints that were not "wet" or flexible. These moves I could have been doing for months in preparation but we didn't know this in time. Time was of the essence. We all decided this was going to be a great union for us and make the birth of our baby a true once in a lifetime experience for us. I really wanted this experience to be different from my other births...always scary, always felt like a ticking time bomb and I really missed my old OB. I had no idea how "midwifery" he was until now.
   Our decision to birth at home was met with a wide range of  mixed emotions from elation to pure terror from those closest to us. Summer, who still resides at home with us, was behind us but unsure of how this whole home birth "thing" was going to go down. She spent much of her time watching me and waiting for the scary event to occur. When it finally transpired, she had taken a holiday to my parents home saying, "Mom, you do not know how exhausting it is to watch you and wait for the baby. I'm going on a break!" Our oldest daughter, Keira, said she was glad we were being safe about this whole thing and Sydnie expressed how weird this idea was and she hadn't heard of anyone else doing this...complete teenage response. My mother-in-law was very nervous about this plan and a close cousin thought we might be making a possibly deadly  mistake. Otherwise, our close circle held smiles for us as and reassured us that we needed to go with our gut feeling as we closed in on our adventure.
   We had lots to do. We spent the next days gathering the needed supplies for home birthing...things like towels, Kleenex, garbage bags, hydrogen peroxide and witch hazel. We began learning all we could about what the future held for us, what wanted and needed out of this experience. During our daily walks, we would spend time wondering when this event would happen. We finally felt like we were in the lead of this experience.
   Because I was so tight, I had hard pre labor contractions that would come and go. We ended up having these for a few weeks as I did the required things to open my hips and relax my round ligaments. We owe a ton of gratitude to Clayton's boss and coworkers who were also on call for weeks as we waited for our natural childbirth to begin. Anybody out there who has done it, knows the true art of patience. Natural childbirth starts and stops to give both momma and baby the breaks they need to endure the big journey. We also are indebted to my friends and family who would text me daily so I wasn't going crazy while I basically waited for Finn to tell us when it was time. My asthma made it impossible some days to even hold a verbal conversation. I love you, my village people.
    Now onto the big event...................
   I had been coming off of a two day stretch of contractions followed by a good day of rest and awoke to a deep pressure feeling and the baby had again dropped further into placement of the birthing canal. But, we've been here before so who knew what the day held for us. The sun was shining and I was wishing I was more mobile to enjoy such days in the winter. I started the day with stretches to help me get mobile and make myself feel good. Clayton was tired...tired of this seemingly endless cycle and his baby was never going to reveal and his worst nightmare would happen of losing both momma and child.
   "Well what's going on today," he asked me. I told him I wasn't sure but I wasn't quite feeling good. He ran out to do some errands and contractions started so I put on my favorite playlist of Ed Sheeran and began dancing in the living room. While he was gone, I started getting harder ones. As soon as he opened the door, he joined me on the dance floor of our living room being my perfect and entertaining dance partner. Slow dancing to Ed Sheeran's "I See Fire" and shaking it out to "Fresh Eyes" by Andy Grammer will forever  take me back to this time. Soon Clayton again sent out the alert to his work that maybe it was happening. "Should I get a hold of Cassie (our midwife)," he asked. I thought yes we should. Before I knew it, I had gone to our room to relax and keep focused on what would be happening in the next few hours. Cassie soon appeared with her bag and a smile on her face. Our contractions were stronger requiring more focus. I used my Monet print as a focal point...it had a big letter O on it that reminded me to relax and open to bring our baby into this world. I met every contraction with the same outlook in mind and the minutes blended. All I could hear were Clayton's words of encouragements, our baby's heartbeat when Cassie would listen and make sure no emergencies were unfolding  and Cassie telling me how amazing I was doing and how strong I was. Each wave of intensity brought us closer to seeing our little one.  I could feel our baby working within my body and squirming around inside of me. I could feel the unseasonably warm breeze from our open bedroom window...that was perfect for me.
   The letter O was my focus and half way through a contraction, my bag of waters broke and the intensity shot up by 1000 percent. I remember telling them my water broke...which is laughable now because I had excess so everyone heard the big popping sound. Each high intensity wave rolled into the next without breaks. That's how my body rolls. I was on my hands and knees and then back on my side. Pushing...pushing....the urge to do such an act is overwhelming and besides a few syllables, that is all you can simply focus on. Soon I could hear Cassie and Clayton talking about seeing our baby's head....FINALLY THANK THE GODS! Clayton really cheered me on and I could hear Cassie and another voice (her assistant had arrived just in time) telling me to really push because our baby was ready to see us and reminding me of how strong I am.

   This delivery I was in every moment. Previously, I would have out of body experiences that I could describe to people it was as if I was hovering over my body. I really wanted to be present for this birth. I wanted to take it all in. Because of my body's position, I couldn't see her come into our world immediately, but within a second I saw the little body of the person I had shared a space with for 39 weeks and 4 days. I thanked Clayton who
had been my doula, my coach and I learned had been the midwife's assistant because our baby had arrived in two hours and 10 minutes from when the midwife arrived. Our active labor had rushed by and her assistant arrived about 10 minutes before Finn came into our world.

   Finn was on my chest immediately and we waited for the placenta to arrive. The placenta was placed in a bowl beside us, still nourishing Finn and Clayton took his position beside us on the bed and the visitors began packing up their things from the downstairs. I asked him questions and Clayton told me his version of the miracle that we had just been a part of. We laughed, we cried, we marveled and held this miracle that we had waited and waited to meet. After about 20 minutes, Cassie returned again to take our vitals and to help Clayton cut the cord. We stayed covered up skin to skin and took all the features of our little one in and just came into the realization of what we had done that Saturday afternoon in March.
   The assistant came in and introduced herself to me because I was completely preoccupied when she arrived. She thanked me for allowing her to be a part of our birth experience and also gave me a personal thank you. She has seven years between her children and is expecting in May. She had been second guessing if she was strong enough for this and after seeing me with a 13 year gap between our daughter Summer and Finn, she was inspired. Haha I'm glad I could give her some piece of mind. The female body is such an amazing thing.

   After more time, Cassie came back in to get my vitals and check my bleeding. It was time for Finn to be measured and weighed as well as be examined fully, receive her vitamin K shot and get the antibiotic eye cream. Still really not knowing the time, I can tell you it had become dark and I watched the city lights twinkle in my window.

   After Finn was completely examined, and I was checked again, our beloved midwife left us with instructions and went on her way. We were left in the comforts of our home surrounded by our dogs and cats and after a few hours big sisters arrived to meet their small counterpart. We ordered pizza and tried to sleep as we marveled at the miracle we had just experienced.

Blessings!