New Year, Same Me

   As the hours wane for 2018, a tradition of looking through the thousands of photographs I've taken throughout the year commences. 

 t first begins with just me reliving the past year but inevitably, I begin roping in my clan to join in the memories. With the ease of technology in this age, not only do I have photographs to recollect, both in digital and hardcopy forms,  but short videos and memes I’ve designed as well. This morning, we marveled at how our lives changed throughout this past year and how many fun memories we made just enjoying our day to day. Last year’s focus was, in fact, making memories.





  For those who wish to just read the highlights:

• Keira is living in an apartment in New Underwood, tackling night classes and management classes while working full time. She is also New Underwood's resident Cat Lady.
• Sydnie moved into her first apartment in Rapid City, graduated high school, and is holding two jobs with one being in the healthcare field, with on the job training for becoming a nurse. She was accepted to SDSU but has chosen to decline the offer until she truly knows where her interests are.
• Summer is an avid Summer....doing her thing, taking high school classes, being a role model “big”  sister and designing and creating her costumes for the next comic con.
• Finn began the year crawling and finished the year sprinting and toilet  trained. She is an artist, gardener, chef, housekeeper, sports lover and outdoors girl obsessed with her hatred of  flies.
• Clayton knows stuff.
• Cris knows lots of useless but interesting factoids.

   We began our year traveling for business in a record winter storm. We found ourselves in minus 21 below as a high, just a few mere miles from the Great White North,  staying extra days to make an important meeting for his career. We still remember quite fondly just how warm the hotel's wonderful pool was. In South Dakota, the weather was unseasonably warm with open waters and Summer, Finn & I took in more trails of the beautiful Black Hills with our four footers. Our backyard was still welcoming as we practiced our yoga daily outside and Finn explored the grounds crawling around.


   February brought the snow to our area, forcing us indoors more often, and thinking about the possibilities that our future held. Dreams abounded! My artwork took on more meaning, more of me poured into each stroke. After years of self teaching, I challenged myself to not mask my visions any longer or get wrapped up on the rules. My Clayton has unlocked any door I had. I found myself painting more often and with purpose....not lost or anxiety ridden as I had always been before. My days of nurturing our wee Finn with breastmilk were quickly coming to an end and I took in every second I could. I kept to my autoimmune lifestyle and my hair has been the longest it has been in over 25 years! 


    March is monumental in our family...it hosts the date of our marriage plus the start of what we call "the birthday season". Finn celebrated her first birthday in Finn fashion at a local hotel's swimming pool with our family and some of her extended family. Her older siblings were joyous to "swim with the Roo" and the grandparents enjoyed watching our family be a family together. Our kids, ranging in ages from 1 to 20, have lots of varying goals-There's lots going on for us to enjoy!


   Our April was filled with birthdays and fun stuff like Finn AND Clayton's first kite flying adventure. We celebrated the arrival of spring with backyarding, hiking and cycling. We enjoyed our Mustang and listening to the birds talk in our yard. Prom was in our midst again and the weather held perfect. We were no longer held hostage indoors, reflecting on things yet to come or not come on the business side of our lives.
   My sweet husband adopted a bonsai tree for me  for Mother's Day and I began the art of bonsai. Steeped in history, this art quickly is becoming a passion for me. The tree still lives.  My birthday was spent in a tree line along a crest of the Black Hills with two of my favorite people. And true to form, the girls and I were lost for a short stint. Our adventure brought us to breathtaking views and laughs. Also, when we got cell service again, I found myself  ribbed in texts by  beloved cousins about my coupe of the year older persuasion and I quickly let my parents who had been waiting in our driveway to take me to lunch that we were alive and well and 20 minutes out since I knew where we were finally. Such is the fantastic life of an immensely lucky home gal.
   Summertime in our house means outdoors as much as possible. We swim, we hike, we bike, we stargaze, we dream, we love, we laugh, we savor. We garden and enjoy what our backyard offers us. It is my art studio, our family gathering place, movies under the stars  and as a wildlife watching point as deer live in the backyard next door. We got to see our resident doe calf twins there. Magic happens when you open your eyes and see. I am a nature mom....getting to be home has been simply amazing. We were outside by 8am, backyard outdoor yoga at 9, playing and artwork or basketball or swimming or blowing bubbles, playing the uke and inside by 8 lol. I didn't think I did as much hiking this year - until I looked back at my photographic history. 

 e might have rivalled our 50+ miles we put on last year! This year, Summer bypassed me in height too and those  long legs served her well on the trails with her finishing first for a change.


   Our summertime ended with a few car travels - we enjoyed the hospitality of the big city Minneapolis on a business excursion, with Clayton having an important meeting and the girls and I taking in the local transportation to downtown. We took the girls to a fondue restaurant and the Mall of America. We finished our summertime season with a joy ride to New Mexico, staying at their state parks in our tent with our four footers. We loved everything we experienced there from the locals to the vast views and beautiful colors Life is a bit slower there than we are accustomed to in the north. We swam in sinkholes,  looked at aliens and apartments. 

On that trip, we were called by mom to say dad was rushed to the hospital for his heart failure condition. His emergency visit prompted his doctor to push his heart surgery that seems to be working wonderfully. Mom is semi-retired (if there is such a thing) and they seem to be on the go! She had her share of health problems but with the right crap (I’m being literal) she is her old self again! 
     Our fall was busy with Sydnie moving into her first apartment and graduating from high school. She is working two jobs, one in the healthcare field working her towards becoming a nurse.  Keira is living in an apartment with her boyfriend in New Underwood and  taking evening classes, working on management classes for her job and working full time. She also is New Underwood's resident Cat Lady. She is loving being a fur baby mom. Summer began the year in middle school classes and finished the year excelling  in high school classes. She is a wizard in algebraic forms and advanced high school geometry. She also is celebrating the fact that she can finally read movie subtitles in the amount of time needed without pausing the show....#dyslexialife.
   Winter arrived for us in our last night  in the tent - on  a camping trip at Angostura with my parents and uncle. We had a glorious bike ride around the reservoir, good food and campfire laughter and awoke to snowflakes as the heater in our tent kept the cold out.

   My extra time away from much social media has afforded me more time to work on personal goals.  This fall, my newest artwork captured the eye of a curator and I was encouraged to submit artwork to a board of their curators. I was awarded not one, but two, one-year contracts by an INTERNATIONAL art gallery, 1340gallery, that represents "not only artists you know, but artists you should know". This gallery is a tremendous opportunity towards my global art goals. Locally, one of my pieces was used as a business’ IGChristmas greeting. In June, I traded a few paintings for a ukulele and boy did that turn into a massive obsession.  I also have achieved a third grade level in Spanish and am still working on it. I'd say the grammer or proper use of grammer has been the biggest difficulty. Finn can take direction in both English and Spanish at this point. I practice using it in real life with others on my Instagram and that has been a huge asset since I have to spell things correctly too.

   Clayton and I have learned the art of patience not only with this gaggle of girls but in his career path as well. The government works like molasses in winter sometimes! We plan on supplying details in the near future...however, we thought that last January! 

Happy New Year and to all and a prosperous and blessed 2019!

Life's twists: Keeping your stress in check

Hi my fellow warriors, family and friends new and old!

First off - our love goes out to our friends in Florida & the Carolinas-heck, all of  the areas affected by Hurricane IRMA!

The world is with you.

   It's been a while since my last post....there has been much to process for our little family! No worries - everyone here is healthy and that is the best thing in the world! Our children grow and grow each day it seems and Clayton and I are too (in other ways). When life gets too cozy, curve balls are a must to keep things interesting, I guess.

   It's easy to get overwhelmed by the stress and let my autoimmune condition get the best of me. For those unfamiliar, anyone with an autoimmune condition that has a tremendous stress mounted on them  will begin to have immune system problems if steps aren't taken to relieve it. Sickness will mount in the form of  colds and flus until you can get back in control and put your stress in check. It's not only important for me but also my family that we spend a few moments every day for ourselves without the thoughts of what might be.

   There are strategies we can all utilize when life's situations can get up in your face and shake things up. Stress cannot be avoided, but it can be dealt with in a healthy manner.

Some tips from the National Institute of Mental Health include: 

• Recognize the Signs of your body's response to stress, such as difficulty sleeping, increased alcohol and other substance use, being easily angered, feeling depressed, and having low energy.
• Get Regular Exercise. Just 30 minutes per day of walking can help boost your mood and reduce stress.
• Try a Relaxing Activity. Explore stress coping programs, which may incorporate meditation, yoga, tai chi, or other gentle exercises. For some stress-related conditions, these approaches are used in addition to other forms of treatment. Schedule regular times for these and other healthy and relaxing activities.
• Set Goals and Priorities. Decide what must get done and what can wait, and learn to say no to new tasks if they are putting you into overload. Note what you have accomplished at the end of the day, not what you have been unable to do.

   A big change for me is not being employed at all this year besides the occasional freelance work....I've always held even a part-time job  (usually 2-3) as I raised the older girls and this is a new concept! How exciting and FUN it was to be able to just be a mom for a while. And then this happens--- your partner's position of over five years gets yanked with less than a week's notice..right 

around the day after his birthday. Sometimes timing stinks.

Thankfully, with both of us used to living on the edge with no real salary to speak of, we had a nice little cushion in the bank. After the initial panic subsided (and let me assure you - we are talking a few days), we tried to enjoy a little vacation time. It has been literally years since we've enjoyed even a weekend off together and even with the arrival of Finn, Clayton was granted three days off of work only. Such is the life of the hourly employed.

   This happened August 1st and it is now mid-September. We couldn't afford to spend too much while we wait for our opportunities to reveal themselves, so we chose to enjoy the scenery around the area we live. Hiking seemed to revive us and open our minds to big changes.

Chica, Finn and I

Lost Cabin Trail, Black Hills, South Dakota

     Clayton has secured a temporary position through a Veterans program  and we are so grateful for that. It is, however, significantly less an hour than what we are used to making and he has an hour commute each work day. We have all switched over to days....that's a big change. We always have enjoyed operating on a schedule that less people take. We loved operating in the minority.  Now we are a weekday family. I have lost my yoga and swimming partner for the time being. We get to swim together once a week - sometimes less due to our new schedule.

   There are positives that we have found with this scenario, however. We really had to sit down, examine  and be open about things we really want. We looked at  what we thought of ourselves, see how we saw ourselves in the mirror...our qualities, our experiences. We actually used this as yet another way to learn more about each other and somehow I think we appreciate the other even more....if that was possible! This was another instance that we were each other's solid foundation in another one of life's lovely whirlwinds. 

My person :)

   We both have been offered job opportunities and we are carefully deciding  if that is the direction we are thinking is best for us and our family. Some of my fellow Hashi warriors have reached out to me and I might be joining up with them on a little business venture....if I pull the trigger, you'll be hearing about it for sure!

    Hiking has been a great tool for me...I feel grounded, stronger, get fresh air and our girls really love being in the wilderness. It's great for all of us! We also have connected with friends with hiking - it's been a win/win.

Hiking a National Park a few hours

away from where we grew up.

Badlands National Park, South Dakota

Black Hills, South Dakota

Mommy & Me yoga at home

Hiking the Badlands with my pal Amy

Until next time!

Blessings!

Stay strong, my friends!

Confessions of a parenting rebel

My name is Cris and my husband

and I cosleep with our newborn.

Let's just let that sink in for a moment...we...sleep...in...the...same...bed...as...our...baby....

   In this crazy day and age in the United States, parents like us feel the necessity to keep this forbidden activity a secret from friends, family and even coworkers and neighbors. And before I get people taking gigantic steps up to their proverbial soap box, I feel I can say a few words about this subject and it's not one that I take lightly.
   I came from a family where we are the statistic..my sibling, Sabrina Jo, died of SIDS or Sudden Infant Death Syndrome at the age of six months. My parents awoke one morning to one less child breathing in this world. My parents followed all of the "guidelines" of the day. My  mom did not smoke with my sister growing in her belly. They followed all the rules. She was in her own bed. She was not too hot or too cold. My family practiced "safe" sleeping guidelines. SIDS happened to my family.
    I do not have any memories of my sister while she was alive. I was only five years old.  My memories are of how she looked in her tiny casket. How they put make-up on her face and didn't they know make-up was for adults? I remember the cold, waxy  feel of her skin and how her smell was tainted. I would later smell that familiar smell in my high school science classroom. I have memories of random sad faces. I didn't understand  how we could leave her alone in the ground.  I was terrified of angels taking the rest of my family. I learned very early on that life just  isn't fair.
   During my youth, I spent  time researching SIDS. And even into my adulthood, I keep an eye on the research to see if the scientists and doctors are making any headway. Thirty years later, there still are unanswered questions to this label. I call it a label because sometimes infant death receives the SIDS label when the death is unexplained. It is still a mystery.
   People like myself grow up physically. We meet someone and we eventually want to have a family of our own, regardless of  the intense fear. Somehow, you conquer your brain and go for it. That first year of your child's life, you are a bundle of nerves. You read up on all the guidelines for sleeping, look at any new research, some of us pray.
   We sleep with our newborn and I'm here to say that I'm proud that I do. Our Finn has her own bed on our bed...it's called a sleep nest. I learned of this nifty little piece while looking into other countries like Finland and how they handle their infants. We aren't the only country that has babies. There is a whole great world out there that has successful child rearing going on. According to the National Center for Education for Maternal and Child Health at Georgetown University,  compared to rates in other developed countries, the U.S. SIDS rate remains high. For example, in 2005, the U.S. rate ranked second highest (after New Zealand) among 13 countries in a research study by Fern Hauck and Kawai Tanabe. The lowest SIDS rates among these countries were in the Netherlands and Japan. And according to James J. McKenna, PhD, "Most cultures that routinely practice cosleeping, in any form, have very rare instances of SIDS. SIDS occurrences are among the lowest in the world in Hong Kong, where cosleeping is extremely common".
   There are safe ways to sleep with your infant, so that people like myself, can sleep. But sadly, there are few resources in America where parents can find good information. A big push of governmental offices is to push families into not having a hands on approach to sleeping. We just received a parcel through the postal mail from our state's Governor that included several pamphlets and a child's book about safe sleeping including sleeping alone in the crib. My husband and I agreed that we wanted to be safely close to our little miracle all of the time. We've been through so much and with our history of miscarriages and my own history with SIDS, we looked into all options.

Safe Ways To Cosleep

   According to the United Kingdom's The National Institute for Health and Care Excellence (NICE), there are some safety guidelines to follow.

• Keep your baby cool by using sheets and blankets rather than a duvet.
• Ensure bedding does not cover your baby’s face or head.
• Always put your baby to sleep on their back rather than their front or side.
• Babies don’t need a pillow until they are at least a year old. They should also be kept away from parents' pillows.
• Never risk falling asleep with your baby on a sofa or armchair. If you’re feeling really tired and think you may fall asleep with your baby while feeding or cuddling them on a sofa or armchair, move to a bed (keeping in mind the safety guidelines above) or, if possible, ask your partner, friend or family member to look after them while you get some rest. 

For more indepth research and tips on cosleeping, click here.

   We enjoy cosleeping. She practically has her own half of our bed and we enjoy ours -my husband and I love to 'sleep pile'--- sleep in a pile. :) We like to cuddle together and listen to her breathing, dreaming and laughing in her sleep right next to us. There is a loving touch from one of us as soon as she utters a noise. I can groggily breastfeed our baby from the comfort of our bed and maybe catch a few zzz's afterwards before we start our exciting days. Finn enjoys her nest---sleeping and then waking up and  looking  around the room in which she was born. There is nothing more natural to us. And honestly, I think many of the people we know cosleep at some point of their infant's life....they are just closet cosleepers.

We cosleep - Hear Our ROAR!