Living the Dream!

   2017 has been an exciting year for me! My lifestyle changes have paved the way to the birth of our rainbow baby, Finn...I no longer have to be on a synthetic thyroid and have healed my thyroid...BIG STUFF! I've had some long term goals and plans come into fruition, one of which I'm proud to blog about today .......

My Spring/Summer Curated Signature Collection for VIDA  went LIVE at about 7:00 p.m. MST! What this means is that models are wearing the accessories that I designed. I am now an accessories designer :)
I am so excited about the pieces being featured. The whole project has been amazing and one that I have been able to enjoy as I am staying at home with our daughters, Summer and Finn. The featured piece entitled Nature's Open Heart is being spotlighted on the main shop section on the VIDA website. It is quite an honor to be featured in their shop all section and something I have dreamed about since being contacted by them about displaying my artistic talents.
   This collection includes some of my acrylic artwork as well as photographs from our area and promotes the beauty of nature and highlights South Dakota living. The featured pieces are actually shots taken in one of my favorite spots in this world---our backyard in South Dakota in the USA. Nature's Open Heart  is a photograph of a native South Dakota flower with beautiful attributes....tall and proud, lightly fragrant purple flowers, food for our state insect, the bee. It is known by many names Old Settler Lilac, Skyrockets, Firework flowers to name a few. These flowers always remind me of my grandparents on both sides of my family, the Andersons and the Halls. The little purple petals bring warm memories bubbling up to the surface. The fragrance washes hugs and kisses throughout my system....warm fuzzies!

Look at our finished Look!!

I'm so proud of it!

   OK let's talk about this whole designer curated process....in one word, AMAZING! I was contacted by VIDA about possibly featuring a few pieces with their models and I jumped at the chance. From the comfort of my home, I met with my design team online. First I was given the choice of which of my products I wanted to highlight. I quickly picked my favorites and next up was picking the models....the choices were difficult. My thoughts turned toward color of hair, style of hair, the complete look-very exciting and daunting! Once that was complete, poses of the models and how to display the product was addressed. There were so many factors to think about! I strolled outside to visit with my husband and father-in-law about the many creative choices. They were knee-deep in assembling a new basketball hoop but threw some chuckles my direction as I contemplated the project. There were several times during the process that I just couldn't believe I was getting to actually do this! I think I smiled through the whole thing! The last decision to be made was the backgrounds for the models ... again, thoughts trying to wrap around the whole picture. I think our final images are a big WIN. I absolutely am thoroughly pleased and more importantly, proud of this work..
   In a few weeks, I will have some of my pieces available for purchase offline...that's right! I will have pieces on hand available! We are planning some fun social media events and we are making my presence known at small venues like our local Farmer's Market during this summer season.

   And now I proudly present my Curated collection. Click HERE please and share this collection like crazy!

   Blessings!

Enjoying the South Dakota sun with Finn & Chica

my hammock is filled with the best!

Confessions of a parenting rebel

My name is Cris and my husband

and I cosleep with our newborn.

Let's just let that sink in for a moment...we...sleep...in...the...same...bed...as...our...baby....

   In this crazy day and age in the United States, parents like us feel the necessity to keep this forbidden activity a secret from friends, family and even coworkers and neighbors. And before I get people taking gigantic steps up to their proverbial soap box, I feel I can say a few words about this subject and it's not one that I take lightly.
   I came from a family where we are the statistic..my sibling, Sabrina Jo, died of SIDS or Sudden Infant Death Syndrome at the age of six months. My parents awoke one morning to one less child breathing in this world. My parents followed all of the "guidelines" of the day. My  mom did not smoke with my sister growing in her belly. They followed all the rules. She was in her own bed. She was not too hot or too cold. My family practiced "safe" sleeping guidelines. SIDS happened to my family.
    I do not have any memories of my sister while she was alive. I was only five years old.  My memories are of how she looked in her tiny casket. How they put make-up on her face and didn't they know make-up was for adults? I remember the cold, waxy  feel of her skin and how her smell was tainted. I would later smell that familiar smell in my high school science classroom. I have memories of random sad faces. I didn't understand  how we could leave her alone in the ground.  I was terrified of angels taking the rest of my family. I learned very early on that life just  isn't fair.
   During my youth, I spent  time researching SIDS. And even into my adulthood, I keep an eye on the research to see if the scientists and doctors are making any headway. Thirty years later, there still are unanswered questions to this label. I call it a label because sometimes infant death receives the SIDS label when the death is unexplained. It is still a mystery.
   People like myself grow up physically. We meet someone and we eventually want to have a family of our own, regardless of  the intense fear. Somehow, you conquer your brain and go for it. That first year of your child's life, you are a bundle of nerves. You read up on all the guidelines for sleeping, look at any new research, some of us pray.
   We sleep with our newborn and I'm here to say that I'm proud that I do. Our Finn has her own bed on our bed...it's called a sleep nest. I learned of this nifty little piece while looking into other countries like Finland and how they handle their infants. We aren't the only country that has babies. There is a whole great world out there that has successful child rearing going on. According to the National Center for Education for Maternal and Child Health at Georgetown University,  compared to rates in other developed countries, the U.S. SIDS rate remains high. For example, in 2005, the U.S. rate ranked second highest (after New Zealand) among 13 countries in a research study by Fern Hauck and Kawai Tanabe. The lowest SIDS rates among these countries were in the Netherlands and Japan. And according to James J. McKenna, PhD, "Most cultures that routinely practice cosleeping, in any form, have very rare instances of SIDS. SIDS occurrences are among the lowest in the world in Hong Kong, where cosleeping is extremely common".
   There are safe ways to sleep with your infant, so that people like myself, can sleep. But sadly, there are few resources in America where parents can find good information. A big push of governmental offices is to push families into not having a hands on approach to sleeping. We just received a parcel through the postal mail from our state's Governor that included several pamphlets and a child's book about safe sleeping including sleeping alone in the crib. My husband and I agreed that we wanted to be safely close to our little miracle all of the time. We've been through so much and with our history of miscarriages and my own history with SIDS, we looked into all options.

Safe Ways To Cosleep

   According to the United Kingdom's The National Institute for Health and Care Excellence (NICE), there are some safety guidelines to follow.

• Keep your baby cool by using sheets and blankets rather than a duvet.
• Ensure bedding does not cover your baby’s face or head.
• Always put your baby to sleep on their back rather than their front or side.
• Babies don’t need a pillow until they are at least a year old. They should also be kept away from parents' pillows.
• Never risk falling asleep with your baby on a sofa or armchair. If you’re feeling really tired and think you may fall asleep with your baby while feeding or cuddling them on a sofa or armchair, move to a bed (keeping in mind the safety guidelines above) or, if possible, ask your partner, friend or family member to look after them while you get some rest. 

For more indepth research and tips on cosleeping, click here.

   We enjoy cosleeping. She practically has her own half of our bed and we enjoy ours -my husband and I love to 'sleep pile'--- sleep in a pile. :) We like to cuddle together and listen to her breathing, dreaming and laughing in her sleep right next to us. There is a loving touch from one of us as soon as she utters a noise. I can groggily breastfeed our baby from the comfort of our bed and maybe catch a few zzz's afterwards before we start our exciting days. Finn enjoys her nest---sleeping and then waking up and  looking  around the room in which she was born. There is nothing more natural to us. And honestly, I think many of the people we know cosleep at some point of their infant's life....they are just closet cosleepers.

We cosleep - Hear Our ROAR!

Surviving postpartum with your thyroid monster

   AAAAHHHH the little bundle you've been waiting for has arrived!

Hopefully, you got to have the amazing birth experience you have been striving for like we did! Our journey that led with our Finn in our arms was miraculous, beautiful and soul quenching.....and then we spent our recovery time monitoring not only my recovery but prepping for the probable thyroid issues that moms with hyperthyroidism and hypothyroidism have to endure after bringing a life into the world. Thyroid issues..it is a flurry of symptoms that can hit at any moment when your hormones fluctuate severely like they do after you have a baby. It can't be avoided. The best you can do is prepare for it by pre adjusting your medication while you are recovering from labor and delivery and following your recovery directions to every detail. Pay attention to your body and how it feels. Rest ALOT and eat properly. Continue to take your supplements. I cannot express how important it is to stay off your feet. After two weeks, even one event will deplete your energy levels and you know what? That's perfectly fine and to b expected. Your energy will eventually return! Just spend time enjoying your little wonderful miracle!

       I cannot thank my husband and my family enough for taking such good care of me during my recovery. My husband was by my side every hour for the days he was absent from work, changing Finn and allowing me to adhere to my week long bedrest mandate ordered by our midwife. My mom filled our pantry and fridgerator/freezer with easy to make meals and family favorites so my husband and daughter could handle mealtimes with ease. We were so blessed with her foresight for that....we had food for weeks! Our daughter kept up with the household chores. My father-in-law, who happens too live next door, made himself available when my husband had to return to work for any small requests that might arise. We are so blessed! It took me a good two weeks for my symptoms to level out. The brain fog lifted, the rapid heartbeat, the added profuse sweating, the insomnia finally left. The blues didn't take hold like they can with thyroid people....Smiles were all around our little house!

  When your thyroid hormone wildly fluctuates from delivery, it can swing from hypothyroid, which means your thyroid isn't making enough hormone and you supplement that, to hyperthyroid, which means you have too much thyroid hormone in your system. Symptoms can range from headaches to rapid heart rate, inability to handle heat, severe sweating, dehydration, vision changes, swollen eye lids, fatigue, insomnia, joint pain and much more. Not only are you recovering from the pregnancy, you are dealing with these symptoms all while adjusting to supplying milk to your wee one too.
   In severe cases, a thyroid storm can occur which can be fatal in adults. If you have any of the following symptoms, please contact your midwife or obstetrician immediately.

• A very high fever of 100 degrees to as high as 106 degrees.
• A very high heart rate, which can be as high as 200 beats per minute (BPM). 
• Palpitations, chest pain, and shortness of breath.
• High blood pressure.
• Confusion, delirium, and even psychosis.
• Extreme physical and muscle weakness
• Extreme fatigue and exhaustion.
• Extreme restlessness, nervousness, and mood swings.
• Exaggerated reflexes, especially in knee and ankle areas.
• Difficulty breathing.
• Nausea, vomiting, and diarrhea.
• Profuse sweating or dehydration.
• Stupor or coma

Please take care of yourself as you recover from your miraculous journey! Blessings from our family to you!

How our pregnancy journey became magical

   Hey kids from around the world....it's been a while since I've checked in or updates and we just had so many decisions to make on a day to day basis that I just didn't know how to feel about things.
   I'm going to start by saying I have the greatest amount of respect and adoration for my husband, best friend and partner. We made memories that nobody will understand or can even fathom and connect with....he is my breath. Period.
 And now............drum roll .........

Presenting our rainbow girl

Finn Bree Ness

Born March 4, 2017

4:30 PM

in the comfort of our home

   We had quite a journey that turned from truly feeling  terrifying to absolutely magical. From December onward, my husband  took it upon himself to be my most important resource, he helped me and agonized with me.  He learned how to give prenatal massages and learned Doula techniques to help me on a daily basis to turn the baby, keep the baby in the correct birthing position and things that helped me to breath and exist. We ended up having an extra amount of fluid that sent me to the emergency room twice with contractions....information we learned with our first visit with our midwife after she studied my medical records.  We had not been seeing eye to eye with our ob doctor and many times would get zero answers from her or her office.  After a terrifying visit at our local  Emergency Room the beginning of February we began to think outside of the box. I just didn't feel safe under the supervision of my doctor and our guts were telling us to do everything in our power to get away from that situation. It was late in the game for that so options in the United States are limited thanks to our laws. I was still under the care of my chiropractor and that office kept a nice eye of us while we made our decisions.
   Outside of the box in rural United States looks like, hmmm everybody goes to the hospital to have their babies, so any deviation from an OB or even a hospital is a little extreme in some people's eyes. My friend suggested a midwife for us. After researching that option, we both knew that was exactly the kind of care that I needed. I am a hands-on, take charge of my health kind of girl. I do not like too much medical intervention, I believe in myself and the power and might of my body. With all  three of daughters, I had natural childbirths, of which Clayton witnessed none.  Even this late in the game, at 35 weeks, this might still be an option. My parents were behind our decision 100 percent...they knew how afraid we both, and basically our children as well, of the care we were receiving.  We were terrified. I had been housebound since November and this journey was not a fun or enjoyable experience.
   We met our beloved midwife on a sunny afternoon in the comforts of our home, my husband donning his lazy sweatpants and slippers and me mounted and affixed on my birthing ball set up in our living room. I was so uncomfortable and had been for months, this was usually where I was found. She meticulously scanned my medical records for any indication that I would NOT be a good candidate for home birthing. After all, the midwife does not want to nor will be supervising  a candidate that is not within her guideline levels or comfort levels. A midwife should be certified and have an extensive background in nursing and child birthing.
    People in the medical profession always are astounded with my vital signs...they are always much better than even people that are in their 20s. Medically speaking I was the perfect candidate for home birth. It was also noted in my medical records that I had excess amniotic fluid, which could impede our baby connecting with the birthing canal, I was being kept hyperthyroid instead of inside my thyroid guidelines and that the actual due date of our little one was March 7, not the 12th as the ob office  continually told us. We were in the one week window to have a full term baby!
   We began talking about the why we wanted this and what we expected from this experience. My husband simply said he wanted his wife to survive and the baby as well. She smiled and gave a chuckle and said that nobody would be dying on her watch. She then suggested I turn toward the exercises on spinningbabies.com to expand my hips since I was extremely fit going into this pregnancy....and I was going to kind of pay for that with super tight ligaments and joints that were not "wet" or flexible. These moves I could have been doing for months in preparation but we didn't know this in time. Time was of the essence. We all decided this was going to be a great union for us and make the birth of our baby a true once in a lifetime experience for us. I really wanted this experience to be different from my other births...always scary, always felt like a ticking time bomb and I really missed my old OB. I had no idea how "midwifery" he was until now.
   Our decision to birth at home was met with a wide range of  mixed emotions from elation to pure terror from those closest to us. Summer, who still resides at home with us, was behind us but unsure of how this whole home birth "thing" was going to go down. She spent much of her time watching me and waiting for the scary event to occur. When it finally transpired, she had taken a holiday to my parents home saying, "Mom, you do not know how exhausting it is to watch you and wait for the baby. I'm going on a break!" Our oldest daughter, Keira, said she was glad we were being safe about this whole thing and Sydnie expressed how weird this idea was and she hadn't heard of anyone else doing this...complete teenage response. My mother-in-law was very nervous about this plan and a close cousin thought we might be making a possibly deadly  mistake. Otherwise, our close circle held smiles for us as and reassured us that we needed to go with our gut feeling as we closed in on our adventure.
   We had lots to do. We spent the next days gathering the needed supplies for home birthing...things like towels, Kleenex, garbage bags, hydrogen peroxide and witch hazel. We began learning all we could about what the future held for us, what wanted and needed out of this experience. During our daily walks, we would spend time wondering when this event would happen. We finally felt like we were in the lead of this experience.
   Because I was so tight, I had hard pre labor contractions that would come and go. We ended up having these for a few weeks as I did the required things to open my hips and relax my round ligaments. We owe a ton of gratitude to Clayton's boss and coworkers who were also on call for weeks as we waited for our natural childbirth to begin. Anybody out there who has done it, knows the true art of patience. Natural childbirth starts and stops to give both momma and baby the breaks they need to endure the big journey. We also are indebted to my friends and family who would text me daily so I wasn't going crazy while I basically waited for Finn to tell us when it was time. My asthma made it impossible some days to even hold a verbal conversation. I love you, my village people.
    Now onto the big event...................
   I had been coming off of a two day stretch of contractions followed by a good day of rest and awoke to a deep pressure feeling and the baby had again dropped further into placement of the birthing canal. But, we've been here before so who knew what the day held for us. The sun was shining and I was wishing I was more mobile to enjoy such days in the winter. I started the day with stretches to help me get mobile and make myself feel good. Clayton was tired...tired of this seemingly endless cycle and his baby was never going to reveal and his worst nightmare would happen of losing both momma and child.
   "Well what's going on today," he asked me. I told him I wasn't sure but I wasn't quite feeling good. He ran out to do some errands and contractions started so I put on my favorite playlist of Ed Sheeran and began dancing in the living room. While he was gone, I started getting harder ones. As soon as he opened the door, he joined me on the dance floor of our living room being my perfect and entertaining dance partner. Slow dancing to Ed Sheeran's "I See Fire" and shaking it out to "Fresh Eyes" by Andy Grammer will forever  take me back to this time. Soon Clayton again sent out the alert to his work that maybe it was happening. "Should I get a hold of Cassie (our midwife)," he asked. I thought yes we should. Before I knew it, I had gone to our room to relax and keep focused on what would be happening in the next few hours. Cassie soon appeared with her bag and a smile on her face. Our contractions were stronger requiring more focus. I used my Monet print as a focal point...it had a big letter O on it that reminded me to relax and open to bring our baby into this world. I met every contraction with the same outlook in mind and the minutes blended. All I could hear were Clayton's words of encouragements, our baby's heartbeat when Cassie would listen and make sure no emergencies were unfolding  and Cassie telling me how amazing I was doing and how strong I was. Each wave of intensity brought us closer to seeing our little one.  I could feel our baby working within my body and squirming around inside of me. I could feel the unseasonably warm breeze from our open bedroom window...that was perfect for me.
   The letter O was my focus and half way through a contraction, my bag of waters broke and the intensity shot up by 1000 percent. I remember telling them my water broke...which is laughable now because I had excess so everyone heard the big popping sound. Each high intensity wave rolled into the next without breaks. That's how my body rolls. I was on my hands and knees and then back on my side. Pushing...pushing....the urge to do such an act is overwhelming and besides a few syllables, that is all you can simply focus on. Soon I could hear Cassie and Clayton talking about seeing our baby's head....FINALLY THANK THE GODS! Clayton really cheered me on and I could hear Cassie and another voice (her assistant had arrived just in time) telling me to really push because our baby was ready to see us and reminding me of how strong I am.

   This delivery I was in every moment. Previously, I would have out of body experiences that I could describe to people it was as if I was hovering over my body. I really wanted to be present for this birth. I wanted to take it all in. Because of my body's position, I couldn't see her come into our world immediately, but within a second I saw the little body of the person I had shared a space with for 39 weeks and 4 days. I thanked Clayton who
had been my doula, my coach and I learned had been the midwife's assistant because our baby had arrived in two hours and 10 minutes from when the midwife arrived. Our active labor had rushed by and her assistant arrived about 10 minutes before Finn came into our world.

   Finn was on my chest immediately and we waited for the placenta to arrive. The placenta was placed in a bowl beside us, still nourishing Finn and Clayton took his position beside us on the bed and the visitors began packing up their things from the downstairs. I asked him questions and Clayton told me his version of the miracle that we had just been a part of. We laughed, we cried, we marveled and held this miracle that we had waited and waited to meet. After about 20 minutes, Cassie returned again to take our vitals and to help Clayton cut the cord. We stayed covered up skin to skin and took all the features of our little one in and just came into the realization of what we had done that Saturday afternoon in March.
   The assistant came in and introduced herself to me because I was completely preoccupied when she arrived. She thanked me for allowing her to be a part of our birth experience and also gave me a personal thank you. She has seven years between her children and is expecting in May. She had been second guessing if she was strong enough for this and after seeing me with a 13 year gap between our daughter Summer and Finn, she was inspired. Haha I'm glad I could give her some piece of mind. The female body is such an amazing thing.

   After more time, Cassie came back in to get my vitals and check my bleeding. It was time for Finn to be measured and weighed as well as be examined fully, receive her vitamin K shot and get the antibiotic eye cream. Still really not knowing the time, I can tell you it had become dark and I watched the city lights twinkle in my window.

   After Finn was completely examined, and I was checked again, our beloved midwife left us with instructions and went on her way. We were left in the comforts of our home surrounded by our dogs and cats and after a few hours big sisters arrived to meet their small counterpart. We ordered pizza and tried to sleep as we marveled at the miracle we had just experienced.

Blessings!